Post by Stevie Satisfaction on Oct 26, 2024 18:40:52 GMT -5
# There ain't no grave... #
From the darkness of the night, the Boston crowd continues to chant the name of their hero.
“STE-VIE!”
“STE-VIE!”
“STE-VIE!”
We fly just past the look of confusion on the face of the EPW champion Donnie Harris on the ramp, past the thousands of fans chanting the name of the Ste-VP of ‘And Justice for Brawl’, and up past the various medical staff who are working on the man of the moment himself as we arrive to the face of Stevie Satisfaction. His eyes are barely open, but looking upwards in the middle of the ring there is a single spotlight that hangs from the rafters of the TD Garden here in Boston that just seems to be in the perfect spot to hit Stevie Satisfaction right in the pupils.
And that light is the last thing that Stevie will remember from that night.
Stevie’s eyes slowly begin to shut as the EPW medical staff continues to attempt to get Stevie back to his feet and out of the ring while the crowd is still in enough frenzy that they wouldn’t notice that his feet would be dragging behind.
Moments later in the back out of the view of all the fans the medical staff continues to do their best to bring Stevie back.
We cut to static.
And that static continues, until someone slaps the side of the television bringing about the black and white footage from some schlocky horror movie from late night TV. Just as the vampire raises up from the coffin complete with the wire effects showing, that vampire turns towards the camera and begins to speak… out of character, maybe?
“Stevie.
Earth to Steeeeeevie. There you are, coming in clear.
Hey Stevie, it’s me, your old pal Stevie Walden, the guy who played dracula in those old black and white movies you used to watch during the late night hours after your dad passed out. Hey, it was either this or the scrambled porn on Cinemax and I went with the seasonal choice. Maybe next time you get knocked out we’ll go with the other option instead. Anyway, you’re probably wondering why exactly are you dreaming about a late night horror icon like myself. Well, there is a great reason for that…”
The Stevie-pire then taps the glass of the TV screen, really breaking the fourth wall at this point.
“Are you with me, Stevie? Because we’re going to have to move this along quickly because one, you’re about to wake up and two, the sun is about to come up and as you know I cannot be… well, you get the idea.
Look, you lost and, no pun intended, that really sucks. But here’s the thing Stevie, everyone eventually loses. Don’t believe me? Do you know how many times I’ve lost in my movies? Think about it, I played an unstoppable killing machine that could turn into a bat or other weird shit in over a dozen movies, and do you know what happened to me every single time? Yeah, I lost. Makes absolutely no sense because I could literally kill a person with a flick of my finger, but somehow I manage to get stabbed in the heart over and over again. Hell, they even tricked me to step into the sunlight one time.
But I didn’t quit, I didn’t stay down. No, I rose from the dead in ‘Fear of the Vampire Part II’ and all of its subsequent sequels even more determined than ever before to have the audience chanting my name by the time the credits rolled.
Sound familiar?”
The Stevie-pire taps on the glass of the screen again and even flashes those really fake looking plastic fangs that he’s been wearing this entire time.
“So don’t let the loss get you down, Stevie. Think of all that you’ve already accomplished in just a few short months… think of where you’ll be in just a few short years from now. I played a vampire for twenty years of my life, and I loved every minute of it and the fangs drove the ladies crazy. I even was able to get into the top ten of the rankings of the Secret Society of Stevies before my time was up. But you? You’ve really changed things around here and you’ve made Elevated Pro Wrestling a place for more than just outcasts and misfits. The world is buzzing about what happened in Boston. People are lining up in order to see what Stevie Satisfaction is going to do in that very ring each and every single night. Hell, you even made Clyde Newton magically reappear. The roster is filling up with real talent, and they’re all looking to take a shot at you Stevie. That’s why you’ve got to wake up Stevie, and get ready for this match…
Because you don’t want to end up being buried next to me.”
And just as the Stevie-pire begins that really obnoxious vampire laugh, Stevie Satisfaction’s eyes pop open and he is sitting there watching the blank screen of a television. Slowly, the light from the rising sun begins to poke through the window which causes Stevie to stand up. He is still clearly fighting the pain in his ribs as he shuffles over towards the window in order to shut the blinds. He doesn’t even turn around before he begins to speak.
“No, no. I don’t want to end up being buried next to you.
And I know what I should do, I should sit this one out. I should just take a little time off and let these ribs and the bruising underneath heal fully before I make my return. And you know what? After my showing at ‘And Justice for Brawl’ I don’t think there would be a single person on the face of the Earth that would blame me for doing so. That’s the smart play, that would be the best for my long term career.
But, I’m not worried about that.
What I am worried about is that any night that I take off, the fans of this company will not go home satisfied. The mere thought of that keeps me up to the brink of the dawn. Of course, EPW management stepped in and told me that no matter what, that I was not allowed to be at Danger this week. But with enough begging and pleading, I’m going to take part in the first ever Mass Graves match at Halloween Havok just a few days later.
Oh, and the sharks are starting to circle around because there is blood in the water… I’m sure of it now. Stevie Satisfaction was beaten one time in his EPW career and now all these second tier wrestlers are coming out of the woodwork in order to try and put some literal dirt on my grave. I don’t care who they are to be honest, save for one, Alexandra Calaway. Somehow she shows up right there getting into my unfinished business with Donnie Harris, and why? Because she’s the boss’ friend or former friend or whatever? No, no. That’s not how this works.
I’m going to make it my mission to bury Alexandra right there in front of the boss, in front of Donnie Harris on commentary and all the fans filling the house. Because the person to get the next shot at the World Champion is not going to be someone who walks right in and is promised a future shot without earning it like I had to. The person who gets the shot at End Game is going to be the one who shows up and grinds it out each and every single night leaving the fans completely one hundred percent satisfied. The person who is going to get that shot at End Game is me.
Stevie reaches out towards the camera, and now it is he who is doing the knocking on the screen.
“Make no mistake about it, I’m the ultimate threat, Donnie. I’m the one that’s going to break your run at the top. Boston wasn’t a stake through my heart, it was only the exciting first round that got the crowd going and something so good as that is going to require a sequel. Mark my words my Stevie-holics, by the end of Halloween Havok I will be the one standing on the freshly covered graves of pretenders to my throne. This is the start of my ascension back to where I belong at the top of the card and placing me back on track to my own End Game. Because just as the song says, there ain’t no grave.”
With that Stevie pushes the camera away and uses the remote control to turn off the television and head on back to work. We fade to black, but not before the echoing sounds of Johnny Cash can be heard throughout the still of the night.
# ...can hold my body down #