Post by Shawn Savage on Oct 29, 2024 10:19:09 GMT -5
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With his greatest moment in wrestling just behind him, we meet our intrepid hero continuing to experience the bliss of being victorious not just once, but twice in quick succession, to the point where most ordinary people wonder what even is going on at this point.
Having experienced the success only average wrestlers dream about, he has temporarily moved his entire trailer park to a sunnier side of the earth, not feeling oppressed by the encroaching winter weather they now temporarily find themselves in the great nation of Mexico, where just by being there everything around them turns into a sandy brown hue.
“I can’t believe I done it, HYPE. I have made it to the big time!” Shawn spoke as he lay on a lounger on top of his trailer, baking in the sun wearing a disturbing lack of sunscreen.
But of course the better part of his chest is protected by the ultimate virginity protector that is the Revival title, a title that guarantees him a title shot at any given time in the future, a near enough guarantee that one day he might even call himself EPW world champion.
“Yo that shit was fuckin’ tite, bro. The entire extended family was partying from sun up to sun down last I heard. And now we here in Cancun having the time of our life some more.”
“Yeah brosef, this is the life, this is exactly what I was aiming for when I first took that large leap for Shawnkind off the roof off my trailer and hit baby’s first ever Flip Hard. That’s the shit I was aiming at. First I got the gold, next I will get to clap them bootycheeks of the bosslady when I rizz her up harder than anybody has been rizzed up before. She might be busy now, but once she gets that offer she can’t refuse, it’s all gonna be joever.”
“Hells to the yeahs my dog, Brit lady ain’t gonna know what hit her from behind. Ain’t no sanctity safe when you’re around, and that chick’s boytoy be malding because he know it’s a matter of time before all they want is that S-Dog sauce over and over and over again, baybee.” HYPE hyped along with him, getting weirdly into it for his best friend.
Sitting up, Shawn let the title drop showing off a giant white spot where the virginity protector had stopped the sun from doing its work. He nodded along, seemingly thinking about more.
“You right, but you know, we need to have bigger plans. We can take this place over, we can run this place, I ain’t just here to hit it and quit it, but I am going to show the bosslady that I am more than just a massively hung rogue with a heart of rose gold. That’s why I signed both of us up for the next opportunity, tag team gold, we just have to beat up those new fruitcakes that showed up, and before you know it I won’t just be carrying the revival title, but on the other shoulder there will be a tag title, and in my hand there will be a sizable chunk of that bossly ass, if you know what I am saying. Gonna stop living like the jester and start living like the king, if you know what I mean, dude.”
HYPE hopped up to a seated position himself, first looking worried then looking excited.
“You’re telling me you and me, partners in crime, gonna be fighting in the ring together! Bro, that’s like… The best shit you ever came up with. Sure, I ain’t got the training like you, but our bro-dom ain’t gonna be beaten by some fruity art school rejects let alone the tag champions who’ll we’ll face right after. You, Me, a crate of white claws, and we shall be running roughshod on the entirety of EPW in ways that nobody has ever seen.” he’d answer, clearly psyching himself up.
Turning to face his best friend, Shawn extended his hand. “Put it here, you son of a bitch!”
“We keepin’ this shit tizzite!” HYPE answered as he clapped his hand into Shawn’s so hard that they fell backwards off the trailer to the ground below.
They’d be mostly fine…
[END]